People keep telling me things I need to hear. Though occasionally jarring, it's always beneficial in the end. It is very healthy to have people like this in one's life: those who will get up in your business and look you in the eye and say, "What are you doing? What masks are you hiding behind?" I have had an abundance of these penetrating, earnest conversations these past two months that I almost don't know what to do with them; it's still so fresh to me. These sorts of meetings (collisions of spirits, really) have happened to me almost every day this week, through various methods through various people. And it is good. And I have needed it.
For example, Alex's talk tonight at IV was reassuring and challenging and appropriately aggressive. I am thankful that he isn't afraid to tell us where we need to repent, as so many Christian leaders seem to be loath to do these days. He said many true things, but the one that stuck in my mind like a briar was this one: "Busyness is a breeding ground for loneliness." So often we think the opposite, that busyness is the antidote to loneliness; that if we only have enough things to do, we won't feel the oppressive isolation, we'll somehow forget the lack of meaningful relationships in our short lives. I believe this lie. I am still learning to let it go. But I am heartened to see the gradual progress I have made in this area. Slowly, slowly, I release it; slowly, slowly I turn...
"KEEP ON loving each other as brothers and sisters." (Hebrews 13:1)
Taking a stroll around Gimghoul with my lover a few days ago...
Me: What are you going to do after this?
Catherine: I don't know. Run around. Start a fire in the forest. Incite revolt.
Tonight one of the women in IV encouraged us ladies, due to the excessive drought that our state is suffering from, to stop shaving to conserve water. I am totally down with that.
(I am re-learning how to be alone.)
Two song lyrics that have been absolutely killing me lately: Such brilliance!
1. "Oh, I don't know suffering; not even outside my front door / And I join the oppressors of those I choose to ignore / And I'm trading for comfort for human life / And that's not just murder, it's suicide / This too shall be made right."-- Derek Webb, "This Too Shall Be Made Right"
2. "And the string section's screaming like horses in a barn burning up..." -- Josh Ritter, "Rumors"
I cannot contain my excitement about going home for fall break... I even dreamed about it last night...